White Album – 08: Jesus hates Yuki, this I know cuz the Bible tells me so…

I take it that he forgot to lock the door…

Rina: I spent a day at the Eiji’s Studio once in the dark it’s a hell hole, covered in raw sewage, guards breaking some idol’s fingers with a hammer out just out of pure fucking meanness. People die of starvation there all the time. I saw Haruka’s brother in the opposite cell catch a rat with his teeth because they have them handcuffed 24 hours a day for two months. He couldn’t eat, seeing some one do that…he was weeping as he crushed it to death in his mouth. See it in his eyes, his face. It’s madness. He was dead three days later.

Haruka: What killed him?

Rina: Realization of what he turned into.

Hello little boy are you lost?

Oh yeah this was based off a hentai game alright…

Haha jokes on him Haruka has no boobs…

So it seems that Eiji is a first class narcissist in that he thinks that he’s peaked in life while Landser Fujii has amply demonstrated how one could continually improve oneself. Though like all artists Eiji is a poncy little sissy that never thought about doing anything physically demanding and instead faps to Yuki’s piss poor singing. Rina admits how she is no longer Eiji’s toy and hints that she is ronrey and that she wants some one to talk to. Rina hints that Touya can still be with Yuki if he wasn’t such a coward and a loser. Haruka gets accosted alone at night because two kindly gents felt like tossing a puppy in to the street and saw her moping around. Mana saves the day in the most BS manner without the GN Pixie dust. Apparently screaming loudly in Japan will bring some attention in the dead of night on a little traveled underpass. Clearly in 1986 Japan even the crooks were little pussies who failed to realize there was no one around who gave a damn. Still one of the toothless guys tried to grab Haruka’s boobs, but found out that was flatter than Mako-cakes.

Hooray for more Rina screen time!

Touya may you live forever…

Indeed who would willingly wish to be a loser?

Wait so you are a terrorist straigh t out of hell too?

Misaki puts the finishing touched on a wig that could have been bought at a Halloween superstore, and one wonders how much more slowly she can work for her shitty play. Either way since this is a college for posers I assume that she hopes to get rave reviews from fucktards who could not get into a real university. Yayoi seems to be getting a lot of letters from her creditors and decides to toss them all away without reading them. Haruka breaks into to Touya’s hideout which he still has not paid for. Seems like the dumbass did not know how to secure his space, no wonder why he gets fired, he can’t even lock up properly… His neighbors hate Touya so much they don’t even bother to report the break in. Haruka gets to sleep in Touya’s bed for the night though at this rate soon Touya will be jumping in with her. Misaki and Touya start making armor and swords out of wood which look puny and infantile. I have seen better stuff come out of a Chinese sweat shop. Where the fuck is the quality in poorly made wooden toys painted by a five year old? No metallic paint, no sanding, hell I can already see the laziness oozing out of my screen. Pfft…this play is going to have shitty props too it seems, if Misaki and Touya had half a brain between them they could have asked the local LARPers about where to get prop sword made of METAL that were lovingly crafted. Still perhaps that poncy Thespian Club for dipshits was barred from having anything resembling a weapon after they stared running around with scissors…

Stupid loli is stupid.

Oh Kabitzin what’s the point of sending her letters, Yayoi seems to have a thing for unemployed loser harem animu males…

I see Touya was a little sissy when he was a shouta too… no wonder why his dad kicked him out.

Yuki calls while Misaki answers the phone and tries to brag about being there. Both disrespect the only real hero of the series as Kampfer Fujii is praying for the safety of those in need and shopping for himself. The old man also knows about that dumb slut in her BMW but let’s the shit storm brew so that his disappointment he calls his son will get stabbed through the heart with one of Misaki’s wooden weapons of minute destruction. Seeking to further make himself more unemployable Touya falls asleep on his tutoring job for that dumbass Mana who for some reason buys into his hard work BS. In a further bid  to waste money on everything but his rent Touya goes with Haruka to buy a gift for Rina, luckily this crap shopping date did not infect Rina with the stupid and she avoided any phone booths. Yayoi was prowling the streets just waiting for the chance to ram said phone booth for great DOROMA.

Semper Fi Kampfer Fujii, you’re loylaty puts your son to shame.

QUALITY props for a QUALITY play…

New from Ogata Productions the Synthetic Lifeform Used for Teabagging, the S.L.U.T.

Yuki bitches and moans about having to share a birthday with Jesus and is glossing over the fact that she gets the best shit of the year because of Black Friday, though because this is 1986 and Japan is in the Dark Ages where ignorance and sloth are dominant features of their decrepit and degenerate worker’s state there is no Cyber Monday. While Touya tries to make it seem that every one is celebrating for Yuki, she knows that Jesus hates her and really doesn’t give a fuck about her sad little life because she is an infidel. The leader of the Red Menace calls to gloat about getting more points on the dumb test and says that they are not afraid of Rina, but they will be, oh they will be… So Yuki gets a second rate stage for her debut as God and Jesus willed it because Yuki hates Christmas. Misaki tries to kill herself by putting combustibles near a heat source as she dozes off.

So it’s Rina’s birthday and Yuki catches Touya giving her a gift. There is perfectly reasonable explanation for all this but all they can do or at least Touya can do is ask the same stupid question over and over again. Yayoi takes the bastard home and they make out because that is so very loyal to Touya…

Oh really… is that so.

Except that Black Friday means you can get primo shit…

Bullshit. They are celebrating Jesus’s birthday, and he sent a little something for you Yuki…

Happy Birthday, BITCH.

All in all I can see this fail train speeding up. Yayoi had no reason to seduce Touya at this point, he’s already been beaten, but I suppose that is what happens when you are a reject from Grace’s School of Management. Eiji seems to be a masochist, but because he has a pretension to perfection he is a bigger loser than the Pig of Capitalism in DMC. Now those guys were musicians who were continually improving themselves, unlike Eiji who just quit after people realized his shit sucks. For all that fuss over her play Misaki seems to have little to show for it, her costumes are ugly, the wigs look cheap, and her weapons would have been rejected by 2 year olds. I can’t wait to see this shitty play of hers with production values that made my middle school play look like a Hollywood blockbuster. I love how she was scared shitless when Yuki called, if all goes well Misaki can go yandere with those shitty wooden knives she made, maybe Yuki will die from a splinter. Haruka is just fucking sad; she can’t lie or even realize that she could be the greatest thief in this shit series. Mana has been struck hard with the stupid stick as she can’t tell the difference between all the other harmettes from the big Star that is Yuki. Rina should just get a hobby if she is lonely or start working with other musicians if she wants to do something fun. I hear Negishi is still looking for members for his Swedish Pop band, and for a series that is supposed to be about music they have yet to beat out Grotesque or hell even Yuki has yet to beat Raspberry Kiss. I just hope Rina finds a better solution to her loneliness. Nevertheless Sheryl would slap the shit out of Rina for wanting to be Eiji’s toy. I guess back in the day women weren’t respected as much as I thought they would be.

Sleeping on the Job eh? Man 1986 Japan must have been easy going. I think we need a White Album Linebacker…

Hello Misaki it’s Yuki, I am in the house…

The only real man up in this BITCH!

So Yuki hates Christmas and is like the wind in that she is a blow hard and constantly breaks wind. I can see why Touya has the loyalty of a Vichy Frenchman. He never loved Yuki she just showed up one day and became his everyday without him ever having to give anything to build their relationship, which is why Yayoi is doing so well in life because she never makes Touya do anything; hell she even gives him money… I wished Misaki had killed herself with fire after falling asleep the way she did. Sadly though Misaki yet lives to be useless, though to be fair it seems every one but Rina is useless on the female side of things. Still at least Rina hasn’t turned out to be the man stealing bitch that every one thought she would be, it turned out to be Yayoi. I hope Yayoi gets pregnant Misaki can cute her open with a wooden knife. I cannot wait to see Rina as Krauser II when she goes Demon King on these fuckers.

If only this killed the bitch…uh such stupidity.

I see someone forgot to get a gift…some freind you are Yuki.

Oh you can afford a gift, but can’t pay the rent…such found financial management I see now who cauesd the Japanese Housing bubble of the 1990s.

What Loylaty you have there Touya… ah well I hope Misaki kills you both with her wooden knives.

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14 Comments

  1. shawnz
    Posted February 25, 2009 at 8:31 pm | Permalink

    i loled so hard, great post!

  2. Posted February 25, 2009 at 8:55 pm | Permalink

    LOLOL I forgot that Yuki didn’t get Rina a gift (at least not that we saw). Man, Sheryl would totally beat the shit out of every character on this show; Alto may have been wishy washy but at least he could fly the hell out of Valkyrie. Touya just sucks!

    One day Akira is going to look back and try to convince himself that he did the right thing making some shitty crime scene diorama instead of getting laid with his crush of like 5 years.

  3. soyahoney
    Posted February 25, 2009 at 10:10 pm | Permalink

    I’ll give you a similar reaction I wrote on Sea Slugs! Anime Blog.

    My reaction:

    Touya – He listened to Yuki’s RAWR vocals and that’s why he ran.
    Yuki – That pissed off look at not calling was my fave. Was she also doing Gravure?!
    – Nothing wrong with Christmas Birthday. Yuki needs to tell Touya once and for all to LISTEN TO HER SONG!
    Rina – She told Touya not to call her Goddess, then I’ll make her my Goddess! ^^
    – She even has a brother complex. Rina and Yuki ain’t singing for Touya! It’s Dr. Quack a.k.a Eiji they’re singing for!(Remember? Rina said he lost himself. That’s why he’s experimenting on his new subjects.)
    Yayoi – I don’t like her tactics to push Touya away from Yuki but man, was she SEXY! I sense NICE CAR! NICE ALBUM? COLLEGE DAYS?!
    Mitsuki – She can be Kotoha from School Days if she knows how to handle that sewing machine.
    Haruka – She was lost, almost gang-raped, saved by a loli, picked up by her master, lost again, found again, patted on the head, and now, she’s singing about birthdays?! What a waste of 15 minutes.
    – Flashback scene was FTW?!
    Akira – MIA
    Eiji – Take it to the ARENA and FIGHT! (That pic you had of him fapping to Yuki’s song made me think he might have an orgasm. That’s disturbing…)
    Mana – That’s not Yuki, my loli-chan. That’s your lost puppy onee-chan, Haruka.

  4. Jubbz
    Posted February 25, 2009 at 11:00 pm | Permalink

    Oh i lol’d hard at this post.

    And Boo Touya for actually caving in to Yayoi’s advances. What was that guy thinking???
    Oh and Haruka puppy has no titz. No man would want her anyway. >_>

  5. Posted February 26, 2009 at 1:17 am | Permalink

    Eiji’s the shit.

  6. Posted February 26, 2009 at 7:25 am | Permalink

    @Jubbz
    “And Boo Touya for actually caving in to Yayoi’s advances. What was that guy thinking???”
    Not much, probably, other than about Yayoi’s boobs. Not much thinking going on from any character in this anime, really.

  7. Posted February 26, 2009 at 8:07 am | Permalink

    War Yayoi’s boobs!!!11

  8. Nemo
    Posted February 26, 2009 at 9:12 am | Permalink

    I didn’t get why he got so emo because of Yuki’s raw vocals ; special medal for the delusionnal loli.

    Anyways, I’ll just cast my vote for some pregnant Yayoi action. Spread the love Youya-kun !

  9. Ominae
    Posted February 26, 2009 at 1:29 pm | Permalink

    Damn! I like Touya/Yayoi all of a sudden, primarily because of Paku Romi voicing her. So sexy!!!!

    And yeah, angsty pairing. Wonder what happens next? I feel like something should intervene. Like a Gundam.

  10. Master Vivi
    Posted February 26, 2009 at 3:57 pm | Permalink

    Haruka is such a butch, ugh….
    I hope Touya and Yayoi got it on in the car, that would be hot.

    btw, does Japan even have a Black Friday, or celebrate Halloween for that matter?

  11. Narrator 1
    Posted February 26, 2009 at 7:05 pm | Permalink

    I don’t mind Eiji all that much. Anyone who can make Touya out to look like the drooling moron he is wins in my book.

  12. Posted February 27, 2009 at 4:57 pm | Permalink

    @shawnz
    Thanks.

    @Kabitzin
    What are you talking about Akira is going to start CSI: Tokyo and make millions.

    At least Alto-hime could hide behind his utter ignorance of feminine attention, Touya is actively courting trouble. Let’s not forget that Sheryl walked into his life not the other way around. Besides he wasn’t involved with any one when the courtship started, unlike Touya…

    It just goes to show how a shitty friend Yuki is when she forgets Rina’s birthday so far Rina has done plenty for Yuki, but Yuki has given nothing back…

    @soyahoney
    If Eiji is lucky he will at least be an Elmo.

    @Jubbz
    Touya doesn’t think…

    @Thingle
    Correction Eiji IS shit.

    @Nemo
    With any luck Yayoi will soon feel Touya’s crime within her tummy…

    @Ominae
    Indeed if CB intervened they can make an even bigger shit storm.

    @Master Vivi
    Perhaps though I doubt they were hard working enough to go to the back seat.

    @Narrator 1
    That’s not much of an accomplishment Touya is already a drooling moron…

  13. white album rules!
    Posted March 3, 2009 at 2:33 am | Permalink

    Can I ask when Crusader is going to blog the next episode? I can’t wait to read it!

  14. Denitsu
    Posted March 4, 2009 at 11:33 am | Permalink

    This is starting to feel like school days… at this rate yaoi-san will get pregnated and yuki will use a wooden knife to check if its true. I can already imagine yuki hugin Touya’s head…

One Trackback

  • By anitations - collected notes on White Album 08 on February 28, 2009 at 9:48 pm

    [...] has a neat “superlatives” part where the author goes over the +/-’s of each girl. crusader: All in all I can see this fail train speeding up. …I wished Misaki had killed herself with [...]

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