Gundam 00 – 04: Spreading the Gundam Gospel

Whoa you did not invest in big energy? Dorthy and Relena you both disappoint me. Let me guess you sold off your Nintendo stock after the announcement of the PSP too didn’t you?

I really wish that I could interrogate the Sunrise team and discern if they have any logic at all. So we open up in the Middle East or central Asia as Sunrise has willed the existence of another -stan. Its seems that these people don’t believe in check points and by Jove it seems that the Judean People’s Front is making Baghdad look like a bonfire. I demand that a corresponding gaggle of terrorist groups to be named if these bombing continue, and yes even the Popular People’s Front of Judea. Oh and the People’s Front of Judea…

It is very painful to listen to their weird logic on how continuous intervention is going to convince the HRL to scale down their military might. Still I guess it gets really hot in space since the women have discarded their space suits. I hope that in case of an emergency that they have excape pods. Though Tieria is showing his disdain for the mere mortals by wearing his full length pinku outfit. I assume that since he hates being on the ground that by intervention he wants to send the others to do it for him. Lockon and Allelujah have another go at philosophical justification, and while they arrive at the conclusion that once CB is gone fighting will resume. I guess they have finally perfected Brezhnev’s reanimation process or that they have a bunch of people lined up to continue permanent revolution. Either that or in one year every one will have converted to Gundamanity.

I take it they just enhanced your intelligence because lord knows that would not be the only thing that they could have “enhanced.”

She also too young to be your girlfriend.

While CB is quibbling about justification and the like the HRL is forming their own group to counter the Gundams. Seems Sergei is going to have to baby sit an ubermensch a reformed human. Setsuna being the emo tart that he is thinks about how an artillery shell is going to wipe out a whole city. Now artillery does not kill by fire as Sunrise and Setsuna would have you believe, in fact the thing that really does the most damage is the shrapnel and boy does that get messy. However, if Atomic Annie is still in use then Setsuna would be somewhat correct though at ground zero death is instant and only but ash would remain. Still I must protest this ignorant portrayal of Artillery, the King of Battle. Show some respect Sunrise, Artillery will always be King just because you do not believe in indirect fire does not mean that a Gundam can usurp the throne.

Come now Saji be honest. Just tell Louise the truth of how much you love thy neighbor.

As much things change many things stay the same and in Venezuela Taribia bashing America never goes out of style. Still President Bryan at leasts consults the others rather than rule by decree and as Always we Yanks are still quick to respond in force. So I am against this negative “independent” label. Just because the rest of the world takes longer to mobilize than Czarist Russia does not mean America acts on its own, we just act faster.

Glory to the American Military Industrial Complex for the interim solution to the Gundam menace. Now how about putting this one into mass production? Remember that the Black Knights never lose!

Once again we can see the Sunrise stratagem of going along with predetermined plans instead of planning according to the circumstances. I have to say I really despise how Sumeragi doesn’t even bother to scribble on a napkin. I am no fan of plans that pretend to be as good as Count Schlieffen’s. Good thing Sumeragi is protected by the Sunrise pen because no plan ever survives contact with the enemy.

Look in the sky! It’s a bird. It’s a plane. No, it’s Gundam Moses!

Oh Ms. Wang what is your purpose in this series? If she is just going to be eye candy then I demand more eye candy actions. More costumes please. Also stop talking about plans since clearly you have not been relaying anything to Sumeragi. In fact we have never even seen them in the same scene. Sorry Wang you just look silly talking to yourself in the back seat. Also can we get rid of the alcoholic middle aged fellow? He does absolutely nothing. In fact, fire the team responsible for him and funnel that money to Ms. Wang’s costume funds.

It also appears that you have been budgeting too much into the Pimp My Palace fund too. please tell me that this is the only palace you guys have in Azadistan…

So Taribia gets a rude awakening when the Gundams start their assault. Like all peons they are wiped out in short order. Being painted bright orange does not help either, even if they are what I assume to be a penal battalion. Taribia calls President Bryan for aid since the Orange Guard cannot fight its way out of a piss soaked paper bag. However not to be left idle Graham and his squadron actually did some thing this time around. Acre’s custom Flag fought gloriously against emo boy Setsuna, and sent Exia buggering off. I like this new Custom Flag with a sexy black finish though I am disappointed by the incorporation of weapons by Iris. I would have preferred to see Rheinmetall, Vickers, Raytheon, or Krupp.

At least his orders are clear. However, I am against the use of the word “Republic” in your sentence.

It is also good to see Sunrise cooking up more American conspiracy plots. I like hearing about these crack pot theories since everything seems to be going America’s way. I would very much like to see America become the great puppet master that the self righteous ultra left and ultra right believe. Most gloriously of all the Dorthy character, Bakhtiar, makes President Bryan out to be one heck of a president. Bryan is oozing of realpolitik and competence. I dare say that is the kind of man I would dearly love to call my commander in chief. It’s almost like if Kissinger became president, and yes I loathe idealism and other such utopian farce. Idealism is dangerous just look at the the slew of religious wars and ideological conflicts. Say what you will about Kissinger, but this grunt would dearly like to see a greater measure of competence return to politics. Thank Haruhi-sama that the Union is blessed with a democratic leader who knows how to get things done. Politicians are certified liars anyway, at least Bryan is being honest. Besides if you think ideological foreign policy is a good idea I implore you to take a look around, failing that go wiki the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution, now that was a big ideological struggle against capitalist roaders.

That Wang Liu Mei will never have to pay for anything. Hope you brought you wallet Mr. Hong this dayto is not free.

So about this Azadistan and its newly installed Queen Mariana Ismail. I take it that they still have oil reserves under export sanctions, yet are still in dire financial straights. Intelligent people would have converted the last of it into some high grade plastics or make Azadistan the soft drink and bottling capital of the world, but no Queen Ismail is going to ask for a hand out instead. I cannot help but wonder how this oil wealth could have been squandered. Heck nearly every gulf state is funneling that money into diversifying the economy or becoming financial powerhouses with their oil money, so what went wrong in Azadistan? Still good to see some progress in the one of the many -stans, so congratulations Queen Ismail you are the first anime leader of a -stan to be a woman.

Guess what Sweden you are next for some armed intervention. Though I am not sure what possible problems of unrest you may have, Gundam Jesus will turn your bread into bombs. Oh, Egypt they have not forgotten about you either. I am sure Gundam Moses is going to demand that your Pharaoh release all the Gundamites.