Never try to be popular. You just can’t be popular.
According to Panther, it seemed like some of the other Singaporean bloggers have received an invitation to Dannychoo’s Animax Blogging Workshop that I sent my entry to. Obviously, it turned out many other Singaporean bloggers has received their secret email invitations too. This is obviously an insult to my pride as a Singaporean anime blogger in the blogosphere since I consider myself to be decently loved by others. Being the egoistical great blogger that I am, I cannot fathom how everyone and their armpits gets an invite, and I am the only odd one out of this mass orgy.
Going back to my thinking cell, I started to wonder why I am not invited into this exclusive club where all the hip boys are hanging out. Is there something that I am lacking which resulted in my non-direct involvement into the cool group of kids that gets an automatic invite? Below are my speculations to why I am not in this club.
1. Impz is uncool compared to other Singaporean bloggers
When the Wintrain of otaku comes, sit on it.
I believe this is one of the most critical points that has caused me to lose ground against other Singaporean anime bloggers. First off, I should give a tip of the hat to Panther because he gets the invite and boastfully mentions how awesome and proud he is at receiving that exclusive invitation. I mean, he is part of an elite group of anime fans with money to waste on things that are totally useless. Which proud anime blogger will not do that? That is the mark of coolness if you ask me, and that is why he gets an invite despite being a total tsundere about receiving one from Danny Choo.
In fact, I bet he is smirking right now at my inability to even snag a RSVP and he is waving the e-peen ticket at me now. This is why cool boys in the club enjoy their figurines and some of them might secretly demand Tsuruya to be their 2D wife. I don’t have that coolness in me to like the two dimensional world too much. Is that why? IS THAT WHY I DIDN’T GET THE INVITE? Is it because I actually have a real life girlfriend of more than two years? I am sorry for loving the three dimensional. From today, I am suspending my campaign of being a prude, and openly accept the otaku way of life.
Of course, if we are talking about Impz being uncool enough to get the invite, we have to mention the coolest Singaporean anime blogger on the Internet. Darkmirage the biggest anime blogger in Singapore obviously got an invite to Dannychoo’s workshop (I bet he did) since he is the only one who did not have to pay in order to talk to May’N. I mean, no one except for Darkmirage can give such an awesome interview that any spammer can fill in. Moreover, he knows Japanese and watches his anime via raw. Since I am not as awesome as him in the Japanese language, it seemed logical that I am not considered to be cool enough by those people in Animax. Also, a call out to Bj0rn who everyone knows despite not even blogging about anime anymore. I bet he also gets an invite, which makes me very unpopular indeed.
I mean, even TJ the lame troll who tried to make a totally ineffective blog dorama on UFOtable probably got an invite from the Animax community. I guess it is because he gets to be featured in a JAPANESE newspaper, while I only manage to land a front page in the national newspaper proclaiming about my weak and feeble love for anime. Note: You got to be in a freaking Japan newspaper to be anywhere popular.
However, it is just a low blow to be more uncool than a blogger that I have never heard of in my entire blogging community career. So, I am worse than that, huh? Thanks for the reality check.
2. Anoy finds Impz anonymous.
Even Drm trolls me. I must be freaking uncool.
In addition, it is equally painful that many anonymous commentators have told me about how unpopular I am lately.
Anoy A: You know, I know all about Yukan, TJ and Darkmirage. Who’s that faggot Impz anyway? He blogs about the indissoluble peregrination for the procurement of ratiocination right?
Anoy B: Even that major otaku awards fail to include THAT Anime Blog in the list. Who does that Impz think he is?
Anoy C: Impz is old school. He blogs on anime after all. Which anime blogger REALLY blogs on anime anyway?
Anoy D: I think you interpret too much into that email.They probably just went ahead and emailed pretty much any SG Blogger.They probably found you via TeamBlue?
I get it. You guys just hate me because I am not cool enough.
3. Impz doesn’t blog on the cool things
I bet one of the key factors for my non-inclusion is the fact that I am blogging actual anime series such as Kuroshitsuji, Ga-rei Zero and Skip beat. Real anime bloggers just talk about their wish list in Amazon, complaining about Haruhi anime merchandise or being alive. I am a fake anime blogger trying to pose as one. I am sorry. It is only now that I realize that writing an anime blog means you are supposed to do anything but that. I am sorry to be so arrogant.
4. I am not otaku enough
According to Panther, one likely reason for his invitation was his trip to the Toy and Comics Convention. So, it’s my fault to hate any intensive otaku activities? I didn’t know that you have to dress up as a stormtrooper just like a fanboy of Danny Choo to be eligible as part of the fanclub group. I am not awesome enough to wear a stormtrooper cosplay in the middle of the street. That just sounds so ridiculously cool that I am unable to fathom myself in that form of dressing. I should have thicker skin to worship Danny Choo and be eager to see him in the flesh. I should never have joined the Workshop simply because I thought it is fun to socialize despite thinking that most of the advice is pretty useless to a FAKE anime blogger.
5. I am not like Danny Choo
Last of all, I am just not Danny Choo. Honestly, since Danny Choo is the super anime blogger, it is apparent that I do not blog on REAL anime stuff to be considered an anime blogger. I blog about fake crap that is undeniably non-anime stuff. In fact, he even has his own anime mascot. In response to that, Impz will set up a post later to have a mascot too for THAT. Stay tuned for that in a bid to make myself cooler as an anime blogger.
According to Animax, Danny Choo is clearly the epitome of anime bloggers.
Judging ‘The Animax Super Anime Blog’ contest is none other than Danny Choo, who will personally be in Singapore ahead of the contest to offer blogging tips to our viewers at an exclusive anime blog workshop proudly hosted by Animax!
According to my meager knowledge of Danny Choo, he writes on Japanese culture and figurines. Those stuff are real Japanese anime entries, not my junk. He also tries to make people like me feel good by blogging on fake anime stuff once in a while. In fact, he is the best placed to advise the general anime blogger compared to anyone else. Shin, a totally confused uncool soul, clearly does not know what he is talking about.
Conclusion
In a wise man’s words, you just did not make the cut. Sorry, you are voted off Impz.
p/s: If you actually took this post seriously, you fail. Owned. In other words, this is a joke post. DUN DUN DUN~
P/ss: Danny’s voice on the phone is very manly. I feel like a girl now.
72 Comments
I haven’t had such a bad LOL in a long time. LOL~!!1
I wish to be cool. I’m going to get Kuro to start our own anime blogging workshop and not invite Danny Choo. Yeah, that’ll show him.
@Kaori: I bet you are laughing at me because you got an invite too. Very funny, Kaori, the joke is not on you YET.
@Shin: You can never be cool because your name is Shin. Moreover, you blog on fake anime stuff all the time. Try to be better and blog on underpants or nail clippers first. Anyway, you fail so any attempt to be win will be a failure. Fail.
There, there Ipmz! At least you are Singaporean!
@Shance > let me join too! Err my cousins are Singporean … and i think I have a blog! does that count?
Impz, while I must commend you on the effort, you truly suck at sarcasm.
And the only reason why my two attempts at flame war didn’t work was because the first one had cowardly people who didn’t dare to stand up in public and instead are looking to beat me up at AFA (LOL) and the 2nd just has an extremely dilute pool of writers. Yukan anime blog has so many editors and writers that you just don’t really know who’s who.
As for you Impz, it’s probably because you are gay or don’t end your sentences with la and hor, hence nobody knows where you come from. They probably send out the invites based on their email database, which they built up from various ways. I recall joining it when they called for bloggers to promote Jigoku Shoujo.
Also, you suck at sarcasm.
Aww. Less QQ, moar pew pew.
aff i meant Shin,
[20:39] dont listen to anything I say .. i didnt sleep last night =_=
@TJ_han: The true form of sarcasm is to be able to be sarcastic without people thinking that you are sarcastic yet have an inkling that you are in fact being sarcastic. Sadly, this is not even an entry that aims to be sarcastic, so you went way off the mark.
Moreover, since you are part of the cool boy club, I have a duty to methodologically ignore all your lame efforts to make fun of me. Anyway, I bet it is just that I am way too unsingaporean to be loved. Anyway, your attempts to flame war have been diluted ever since you went into university. You have been nationalized, my friend.
I think you should suspend your campaign to be a troll and become a citizen of the animu blogging community with the win factor.
@Nat: =3
here, have some pity.
Dont worry Impz, your site is 10 times cooler than panther and darkimage. And you DO really blog about anime. DannyChoo isnt even blogging about anime anymore, he’s more into figure and merchandise now
Haiz… I think you Impz is already a good bloger that is why you are not needed to attend the workshop. Unlike me, who is almost a total noob at blogging and have almost for the 3 years of blogging been doing uncool stuff… like myself, club and only quite recently anime…
It’s I who should go for the workshop for the failures of bloging and learn the ropes from the Mr Danny Choo.
So please give me a chance to learn and excuse yourself… Thanks Alot
PS: And yes I got it too… … … The RSVP…
platforms vs products. wut
Heh seriously, Its funny, I have never even heard of him before reading this post. . .
Im not an otaku but I do enjoy anime and enjoy the blogs on THAT and Random curiosity as well as Star crossed blog.
I mean Im livin in Tokyo right now! I know Japanese, watch anime read blogs and enjoy it. And I dont do any of that nerdy bullshit, dressing up and going to stupid conventions with all the other fat girlfriend less idiots.
I dont talk about anime at all to the Japanese people I know. . .
I find it funny when They talk about all the stupid nerdy foreigners that always ask them about anime shit. . .and these foreigners are 23+ years old If people like Danny choo REALLY knew what Normal Japanese people thought about them, he’d probably commit suicide on the chuo line! lol
fuck those idiots, they dont even matter.
-IMPZ FAN 4 EVEr!
@Impz: nah i didn’t get an invite or anything of that sort. my blog’s not even a… fake anime blog!
O woes~
ROFL@:Anyway, you fail so any attempt to be win will be a failure. Fail.
Oh silly Impz, you know you wouldn’t have gone even if you had been invited! :-> Workshops = ƒ4!1! DIY FTW!
errr, how about blogging anime, even fake ones?It beats, fake troll if you ask me…
reply to who is DC?
Oi dun Hate, Participate!
Danny Choo is a remarkable person and is one person that I respected. From nothing he managed to now own a company and earn a good life doing what he likes. Not using a cent from his father.
He dares to talk about things he likes and he have found the correct platform of Japanese people in Japan(which you didn’t) and Succeed, so why should he commit suicide?
I couldn’t bring myself to read this, Impz.
I read anime blogs to see what others think about the series I watch, or maybe just casual posts about anime (fans/hobby) in general. Really, it’s the only thing that links us together, and that’s why I rarely visit his site. Hell via the Antenna I’ve visited more obscure blogs than his site.
That said, you and some particular bloggers are IMO quite uncool to say the least, for not writing more entertaining posts/about better series. This one is a welcome attempt.
Don’t worry Impz, Animax is way overrated.
(let us all THAT readers join forces, and protest outside Animax!)
Not all the invites have been sent out yet…
Thanks for the Hits Dude.
I am so cool because i can buy useless merchandise! Gotta stroke my e-peen now.
Okay serious now:
I dont know why everyone over in SG is suddenly so bitchy about that AFA+Danny-stuff.Its quite obvious that they invited DC because hes the most famous Japan-related Blogger.Japan equals Anime in peoples mind – PingPong they invite him to that congress to hold a speech.
If the SG Animax is the counterpart to our German Animexx i couldnt care less about not beeing invited because…well…only idiots will be there…
I aint gonna say more because i honestly have no idea about this stuff.Im too new to the whole blog thing and know nothing about the SG scene.
Holy shit ROFLMAO
TL:DR..
Chill down, meet other bloggers at some mamak stall during the AFA weekend or something.
I don’t know who is Danny Choo either.. so I don’t know how great this workshop is. ^^”a I’m in love with manga and anime since I was 5 years old (though what I read that time were things that my brother bought… ) but never being considered as Otaku up until now. Maybe bcoz I appreciate manga as anime as art, and lack of having such a serious and deeply love for anime/manga character? = =’ (and else that they do) but I’m not really care if I’m not one of them, lol.
oh~ Impz! I’m a bit sad for you since you wanted to go ( well, you ‘were’) but glad that you understand how things are and doing fine. This post is funny, hahaha
@tueac Can we cry together? T_T
@elvadrieng: for what?
Shit, and I thought wearing a maid’s outfit was enough to make me cool.
for those who want to read up on who danny is.
http://www.dannychoo.com/profile/eng/
Who’s this TJ you speak of?
Impz, dont get hot headed over just an invitation to AFA-DC forum. I agree that an invitation would add some pride to the ‘otaku’ status but so what if you dont get it? It’s not like its the end of the world.
Anyway, I am in NS now and rarely read the SG Anime Bloggersphere nowadays so I dont know much of the events in our fast moving internet; I didnt even know of the AFA-DC Forum prior to your blog post so thanks for telling me that.
Chill Bro
Whoa I now know you are Singaporean. Not sure about the AFA dramaz, but I enjoy reading THAT Animeblog for the varying opinions/anime preferences.
Impz is right. I am totally uncool. But I’m cooler than Impz. HOLY SHIT PIME TARADO-*gack*
I bet you’ve just earned the green envy of the Dannychoo fanboys and girls all over the globe now. Imagine blood-lusted fan mobs dying to stab you with their plastic girlies. Congrats.
@tueac Being noob at blogging. Though I need to start blogging about uncool things again before even blogging cool things I’m at a lower level than you? *cries in a corner*
@Abao and everyone else: o/
dude, u are the one who cant be bothered to get updated. i already changed my site. i didnt answer me when i invited u for ur favourite bbq. and no, i didnt get any invitation, im not even rss’ed on dannys site. so what are u worryin about. >.>
I do not understand what is going on so have a pancake.
@Tueac: I am da good blogger? I don’t think so, mate. I think that Danny Choo can teach you how to make money and improve the design of your blog, but I hope for him to focus more on how to create your own niche in blogging. That is the hardest to teach.
By the way, I will never discredit Danny Choo truly because he made japanese culture blogging his own and he is extremely popular. I do feel that Danny Choo’s blog is really not an anime blog. It’s more like of a J-blog, but that is my narrow definition.
@Ryan: LOL YOU FAIL.
@Who: You must be stalking me all around now. Bah! I am also no otaku sadly. Gf always says that I am hypocritical since I head an anime blog.
@Kaori: ouch, now you fail more.
@Frank: Heh, I am uncool? I know. What do you consider to be a cool series anyway? If it helps, I am watching one outs just that I have no time to blog since I do have a life and girlfriend does demand quite a bit of time.
@Sacchi: I actually want to subscribe to it.
@Blowfish: I like the event. They got to have more of such stuff. In fact, this whole post can be sorto of an advertisment to it if you see it from the joking perspective. It’s quite obvious I am not even half-serious.
@Panther: Get lost, you winner.
@E-jump: Lol, I don’t go for anime conventions sadly. Not interested.
@Blist: Dai shocku!
@Elva: Cry together in the showers!
@shin: Not cool enough.
@LianYL: Typo. I meant TL:dr
@ABao: Eww, please do not associate me with the term otaku please. I am pretty much an anti-otaku, an anomaly in the anime blogosphere. Anyway, it’s a joke post.
@Tinana: Punk’d?
@CI: Who are you?
@Double: I guess since I did get a good conversation with Dannychoo for a good few minutes on my mobile cellphone.
@bj0rn: sorry, I must have been extremely busy with real life work during that period of time. Paiseh :<
I don’t see the point in the workshop. Ain’t anime blogs used to be just about blogging about your interest in anime and sharing it with whoever shares the same interest as you?
@Sentinel011: There is a continual shift of blogs as an avenue of money. In other words to monetize the blog to make it profitable. Few blogs, such as Danny Choo, have been able to do that. That is why the workshop is created for that purpose. Whether it is the ends or the means, I have no clue.
@Sojourner: Join the fail-train group please. Queue up.
Monetizing your blog is so 2007. Since the financial system’s imploding, everyone will be using SG$, US$, etc for toilet paper soon anyway. Think Hocchan in Kurogane Communication, if Danny Choo was smart he’d spend less time blogging and more time stocking up on quirky, intelligent robots with lots of firepower.
OH KAY. I GET IT.
Point 3 is a joke?
You’re not doing it right Impz. Sarcasm is not your forte.
Awesome
Yes Impz isn’t cool enough :p
How can we qualify a green haired loli cool ?
Impz blogs on uncool stuff like Shojo instead of Uber Mecha shows or the panties display contest shows…
Impz has a girlfriend that out right disqualify him as an ultra ultimate otaku.
However you are awesome because of those Flaws.
Can bloging non-mecha & non-ecchi get you add revenue ?
Are the add even adapted to the public reading Impz’s articles ?
So anyway back to business Impz I was thinking we could decorate the wall in your bedroom THAT IS CURRENTLY DEVOID OF ANIME POSTERS with maybe a few posters of 13sugars. I have people with cameras in every nation. Just hit me up.. we can photoshop some cosplay onto her and make her look 2D. It will be just like Someday’s Dreamers.
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT.
Impz may not be popular enough for the workshop, but he sure is popular enough to have Danny call him. FROM JAPAN.
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT.
This may be a blow old boy but think about it, all of your new enemies will be in the same place at precisely the same time…
…All I’m saying is that if you want to be top Singaporian blogging dog you could cut out a lot of hard work.
*laughs manically*
IMPZ IS THE BEST BLOGGER EVER! i dont know who these other bloggers are! except dannychoo of course, i flicked through like thousands of blogs before i settled on this one cus its definately the best for anime and good insight on anime/japanese related topics. you others all suck.
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