Ok, we already know way ahead of time that Queen’s Blade is not for those looking for a philosophical take on shounen series. However, even after bracing myself for the possible fanservice eye-rape, I am still amazed at the way it pushes the boundaries of fanservice rape. In a very strange way, I am actually half-impressed by their attempts. Of course, it is up to you whether you wish to read this review, because if you know my preference of anime, you can imagine my response to this show.
Anyway, find out about the first episode of Queen’s blade here, as the new spring season begins. Oh, I am back for the spring season too, if you notice I disappeared for the last two months.
This post is rated above 18 for nudity content and is obviously NOT SAFE FOR WORK. If you want big nice screenshots, go to Mahou Meido Meganekko’s entry on this.
Episode 1 summary
The Queen’s blade is a tournament where all the beauties of the world fought in order to be queen. A girl named Reina was traveling when she attempted to fight a monster who can regenerate. She was about to be killed by this monster, when she was “saved” by Risty. It turned out that Reina had a ransom on her head (the ransom given by her family), and Risty tried to claim it. However, in the process, Risty was captured by Reina’s family for charges of burglary. Reina actually tried to run away from home, as she was forcefully installed as the new Earl. She wanted to choose her future, rather than following the wishes of the previous Earl. Risty eventually tried to escape, but was stopped by Claudette, the oldest sister of the family. Reina, on the other hand, decided to become stronger but the monster came back to take her life. However, Reina managed to kill that monster and decided to go on a journey to become stronger.
Thoughts
Warning: You are going to read one of the most venomous reviews I have ever written, and I have written reviews for close to 2.5 years. Consider yourself warned
If you think my summary is lacking of any proper substance, it is a reflection of how the whole flimsy plot of Queen’s blade is about. It is a sad piece of anime material where it is trying to squeeze the amount of ways you can exploit the mammary glands of a woman to incite happiness to porn and hentai viewers. Of course, everyone enjoys some form of fantasy while seeing women becoming stark naked. It is generic for its story line, with horribly lame characters that are there simply to expose their breasts at a future stage of the show. The story is almost non-existent, and I must say that the character lack any distinctive attitude to them.
If this is actually shown on actual Japanese television, it should be censored at the least. The shock of seeing uncensored nipples (despite the fact that the time it was shown meant that most kids will be asleep) in all its glory makes me wonder how the censors for free-to-air television manages to miss this shocker. Then, we have this monster-like bunny that uses her hand-shaped hair to squeeze streams of acid through her nipples.
Yes, it’s true that it actually happens. In fact, she manages to use that attack to almost destroy the heroine of this episode, Reina. Obviously, with acid and the experience of watching really crappy fanservice shows like this one, you know that means the main character’s armor will immediately dissipate to show you her boobs. Sad times for Impz.
Then, I have a complete shock of my life when I remembered what Calawain told me about the series: the top-draw seiyuu in this series. Then, I actually realize that I am watching Ayako Kawasumi’s character practically naked for 1/4 to 1/3 of the show. That was a double whammy and made me wonder: are all the seiyuu interested in starring for a pseudo-porn series on national television?
Don’t get me wrong. Everyone knows I hate fanservice with a passion but I can understand why fanservice lovers such as Calawain likes Kanokon. Sure, it’s low brow humor with lots of boobs and panties and what’s not, but it has some form of humor. It might be low and perverted, but at least there is a reason why it is there at the very least. In addition, I am not that oblivious to note that there’s a market for people who likes fanservice. Me not liking this DOES NOT MEAN others can’t. However, this cannot forgive the fact that the extragavant fanservice in Queen’s blade is utterly bland and is simply for the appreciation of porn and self-indulgence. There is absolutely no reason and meaning behind any of the abundant fanservice. Why waste 24 minutes on merely boobs? It’s better to watch hentai: At least there’s sex and sexual cries involved.
The ending definitely gave me the right to proclaim this as the worst opening episode of the season. I do not think that any other show this season manages to be so mentally repulsive in the way it present itself. The reason why the summary is so lacking at the end is because Reina actually tries to kill the monster by pressing the monster’s gigantic boobs with her not-so-small boobs. The monster’s boobs, due to the friction between the boobs, started to expand and eventually explode. Of course, the explosion caused by the friction of the boobs managed to kill the monster herself. This kind of ridiculous crap only appear in porn shows, and I am appalled why they even bother to show this. Why?
Graphics are above-average, and I guess they hope to milk as much as they can over this franchise. A quick check on ARMS tells the whole story. They are behind many hentai/fanservice series such as Body transfer, Zettai Shougeki ~Platonic Heart~ (no wonder this show is so crap) and Ikkitousen: Great Guardians. Music is non-existent as well, and you know the seiyuu part already.
In conclusion, if you are interested to see your favorite seiyuus in some pseudo-porn action, it’s really time to watch this. Other than that, I can find absolutely no reason to watch this tasteless, bore, repulsive piece of anime. Yes, even if you like fanservice, you might want to think twice. Of course, there’s another reason to watch this: just to see how bad it gets.
27 Comments
Big breasts bring forth epidemics and cause global warming.
Hahaha, lol. though i though Kanokon was decent with humor. as i looked through this one it only gave me the idea it was a failed attempt to make a Hentai serie… too much boob / too little moaning for a rather interesting story concept. if it had been worked out better i would’ve watched it for the story, but now…im will surely not watch it, go stamp hentai on it…
ah well, still some time to wait for 07 Ghost which i highly anticipate ^^
I have real hentai that’s more titillating and has a better plot, I’d rather watch them.
You people take this far too seriously. I thought it was a fantastic kick in the face to all the neutered ‘fanservice’ shows of recent years who have chickened out and censored themselves. Years ago, bare breasts were not censored because these shows did come on late at night. Shows these days censor less out of ‘decency’, but to drive DVD sales. So, bravo Queen’s Blade. Plot sucks, but who cares. Boobs. And it’s fairly well animated. This isn’t something you can criticize in the same way you would a more serious drama.
For what it’s worth, the animation company behind this does make A LOT of hentai. QB is basically hentai without the sex.
Queen’s Blade: The Anti-’moe’. I’d rather have blatant crappy unrealistic naked boobs than blatant crappy unrealistic ‘romance’ candidates that we see in many other shows these days.
Though to be far, this isn’t something I would spend a lot of time on since there are much better shows to watch
I’m probably going to regret watching this show but eh, fake anime boobs are good fapping material.
wow. i guess i don’t need to wait for the subs.. just watch it raw!
“and I guess they hope to milk as much as they can over this franchise”
golfclap… well played
After watching Ai yori aoshi, I agree with Wotagei – I’d rather see semi-hentai then fake dumb romance. Those moe clichés, useless heroines, retarded protagonist, need to die. Painfully. Like, squeeze their boobs to make them explode.
Still, that show seems pretty dumb…
You have indeed been missed, Impz.
In other news: acid squirting nipples, seriously? Would that make laser-shooting dicks next in line?
Hell I just watch it for the Yuri!
I loved when Kanokon was being completely ridiculous with its fanservice and shota-RAEP, so exploding boobies sounds like a grand old time to me.
Not that I’m trying to defend Queen’s Blade or anything (far from it in fact as I don’t really care about it much either way) but I talked about the prospects of shooting fish in a barrel briefly last night on my own blog and…..well what gives here. Knocking Queen’s Blade for fanservice is like shooting fish in a barrel and it takes all the sport out of stripping down a show to it’s core and seeing what’s left to critique.
Oh well I suppose I get a kick out of this first impression (rant?)…though probably not in the way you intended.
I’m a guy, and I find nothing about this remotely attractive. I’m with Impz in that fanservice in general irritates me. It’s just another way to exploit the female gender for entertainment, and crap such as this only promotes this exploitation further. I mean for God’s sake, acid nipples. They were probably on acid when they wrote this “story,” if it even deserves to be called that.
ahahaha~ desperate times call for drastic measures…
recession —> more boobs?
>I guess they hope to milk as much as they can over this franchise.
I don’t know if this was unintentional but I laughed.
Also, there are so many titties and so many top tier seiyuu that this has to be watched. Mamiko Noto, fuck yearr~
>I guess they hope to milk as much as they can over this franchise.
I don’t know if this was unintentional but I laughed.
Now that I actually got around to watching this episode this makes me blow milk out my nose.
You guys will have to excuse Impz, he is only a trap. Personally, I have no problem with fanservice, but when it lacks both a story and interesting characters, I’d rather just watch porn usually. And I have a decent hentai collection when the urge strikes.
You know with all of Impz’s rants on how he protests to hate fanservice so intensely he has actually managed to convince me of the opposite. Nobody makes a point of focusing that much on something at the beginning of each season unless they actually care about it in some fashion to begin with.
wow Impz, you suddenly make a blogging comeback and you write about Queen’s Blade?! What has the world come to?!
@Shin: And they will result in the meltdown of the Artic cap.
@Braadpan: Yes, Kanokon was hilarious, if a bit too self-dulgent in the sexual part. Still, it is just way too much of a hentai-like show for me to enjoy. Well, no sex too. Sucks.
@Wotagei: Yep, I went to search on the animation company and found Night Nurses. I rest my case. Sure, they are brave about it, but they also gave a total crap piece of anime on television. If you want boobs and nipples, at least it has to have a decent story.
@Jarmel: Heh, you won’t in a very sad way.
@Anime: yep, raw is just fine. Boobs are universal.
@Quint: Glad someone got that.
@Nemo: What fake dumb romance or moe cliche? They are actually there? If so, I am not seeing it at all.
@Myu: Glad to hear that. Nope, how about milk squirting nipples that acts as a laser?
@Highman: What yuri?
@Kadian: You will like this then… I guess.
@Kaioshin: HAHAHAAH, shooting fish in a barrel! Nailed it. In a way, I actually like fanservice of a decent sort, but not like this. Still, it only lasts for 1-2 episode before I want a story line to keep me interested.
@CMAC: Honestly, I will rather watch porn for gratifying sexual scenes rather than lame depiction of boobs in this show. And porn sucks.
@Olivia: then depression: everything off?
@Usaji: Just that it’s the first show I watched.
@EEj: Hardly. It’s milking it.
Just from the pictures, this isn’t Claymore gone awry is it?
Well, to make it clear, it was broadcasted on the satellite network AT-X, which usually doesn’t censor things, so hopefully this piece of garbage wouldn’t see the light of day on a normal TV network.
And, yes, the producers know what they were doing. The popularity ranking of DVDs on the Amazon.jp site has Queen’s Blade at number 12 – and the DVD hasn’t even been released yet! If this is what anime companies are now doing to stay afloat, and if these types of cheap ploys seemingly work, then this is going to be a loooong recession.
Ikkitousen cheats, it’s based off of ROTK. Thing is, the concept and execution was so bad it made Dynasty Warriors look real. But then again, Ikkitousen had some of the most awesome schoolgirl uniform designs that blows out anything shows like Maria+Holic can give.
all I want to say is…
you might get turned on in episode 1, but will you feel the same way after episode 3?
I’m not digging Queen’s Blade. Well that’s my impression based on the first episode. There’s a change that I might be passing on this one if there isn’t anything better to watch.
@lelangir
I’m surprised that this never crossed my mind before you mentioned it.
LoL what to say more ?
Impz this one was bitter pill ><
Explosive acid shooting boobs were the best and only good part, kinda wish they had made the entire show with that silly over the top (possibly unintentional) brand of humor.
Its like when the soft core channel on cable of days gone past would do free payperview night!!